Jenni (koikana) wrote in wichita_ks_poly,
Jenni
koikana
wichita_ks_poly

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Why I became poly

I've started and deleted about five paragraphs now, and I'm still not sure my truthful answer to this question. Part of that is because I'm not moody but my moods and ideals shift rapidly (I swear there's a difference) so what is right today won't be right tomorrow, and my first poly experience was over five years ago and I'm not sure of my feelings or intentions then.

My first real boyfriend was nice and caring, if a little over demanding sexually, and I loved him, but in a carefree, easy come easy go way. His brother was my best friend, and while they weren't particularly close they dealt with the fact that I loved his brother more than I did my boyfriend, but had no sexual attraction to him. At the time it just seemed like they were one entity, two different personalities but the same, and I went to one with problems and the other for comfort, and cuddled one and did more with the other. It wasn't really discussed, and I think talking about it would have ruined it.

I think the explanation that makes the most sense to me is that I'm poly simply because I'm intellectual and cannot have one man-or woman- in my life... monogamy seems to be more of a tradition stemming from instinctual *this is mine* tendencies than having any real basis, except that lots of people can't handle poly relationships. I think that most people who do work out a poly relationship do it because they love the people they simply like to be around, and don't worry about their own needs but their lover's.
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